


Closer to God

by relucant



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angel Castiel, Closer, Demon Dean, Light Angst, Light Dom/sub, M/M, Nine Inch Nails, Songfic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-05
Updated: 2016-03-05
Packaged: 2018-05-24 19:26:11
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6163956
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/relucant/pseuds/relucant
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><i>You can have my isolation</i><br/>You can have the hate that it brings<br/>You can have my absence of faith<br/>You can have my everything</p>
            </blockquote>





	Closer to God

**Author's Note:**

> I am just getting this off my queue so I hope y'all like it.

_You let me violate you_  
_You let me desecrate you_  
_You let me penetrate you_  
_You let me complicate you_

Dean licked down deep, spreading the angel's legs wide and pressing his tongue between them. He ignored Cas' dripping cock, ignored his desperate pleas, and just applied himself to Castiel's hole.

"Dean," Cas breathed out in a broken whine.

"Shut up, angel," Dean murmured, fingernails digging into his thighs. He sucked on his fingers for a few moments, then slid them between Cas' cheeks, pressing carefully inside. His eyes flickered black to green but his touches stayed gentle, watching Castiel's face. His thumbs cradled Cas' temples, and his cheeks were wet with tears.

_Help me_  
_I broke apart my insides_  
_Help me_  
_I've got no soul to sell_  
_Help me_  
_The only thing that works for me_  
_Help me get away from myself_

And Cas threw back his head, arching under Dean's touches. He knew better than to believe it, but every time Dean's eyes went back to the color of leaves, he melted, wrapping his hands in golden hair.

"I'll take care of you," Dean said, even as the Mark ignited like fire on his arm. "Do you trust me?"

Cas shuddered, thinking of the bloody trail Dean had left, of the men back in Pontiac. And then the bile rose in his throat, thinking of what the men had nearly done to Claire, and something twisted in his stomach.

_I want to fuck you like an animal_  
_I want to feel you from the inside_  
_I want to fuck you like an animal_  
_My whole existence is flawed_  
_You get me closer to god_

_No_ , Cas thought to himself. _No, don't_ \--

"Yes," he said. "You won't hurt me."

"Yeah?" Dean replied, eyes dark and feral. "You sure?"

"Yes," Cas said again. "I know your soul. The Mark doesn't change that."

"You think so?" Dean raised an eyebrow, then bit hard at Cas' thigh. "You don't think I'll hurt you?"

"No." Cas sucked in a long breath, then let it out through his teeth. "No. I don't."

Dean snarled, shoving his drying fingers back against Cas' hole. "You don't think so?"

"No."

_You can have my isolation_  
_You can have the hate that it brings_  
_You can have my absence of faith_  
_You can have my everything_

Dean paused, fingers still between Cas' cheeks, and then his head dropped, resting against Cas' hipbone.

"Why?" Dean asked.

"Because you're you." Cas tilted his head back, exhaling. Dean thrust his fingers in hard, and Cas gasped, and for a second Dean's eyes flashed black and cruel. But then he pulled them out again, gently, and fumbled for the lube.

Cas bent down, burying his head in Dean's hair.

"You're perfect," he said, inhaling.

Dean dragged his head along his own forearm, the Mark lighting up like fire.

"Yes," Cas breathed again.

_Help me_  
_Tear down my reason_  
_Help me_  
_It's your sex I can smell_  
_Help me_  
_You make me perfect_  
_Help me become somebody else_

"Cas."

Cas sucked in something like a sob, and Dean's eyes went wide, wet and green.

"Not you," Dean whispered, pulling his fingers out. "Jesus fuck -- no, I won't do this to you."

Cas flinched, curling into himself. Dean put out a tentative hand.

"Dude, I can't deny what I am -- what I want. But not if you don't want it." The Mark pulsed visibly on his forearm, but he held himself back, like a caged --

_I want to fuck you like an animal_  
_I want to feel you from the inside_  
_I want to fuck you like an animal_

"I'm nothing," Cas whispered, still curled into his knees. "If it helps you -- to do this -- even if you hurt me --"

Dean froze, then crumbled to the bed, breathing harshly.

"Don't you ever _let_ me," he snarled, his eyes on the ceiling. "You gotta promise me, Cas."

_My whole existence is flawed  
You get me closer to god_

"I want this," Cas whispered, face still crooked into his elbow. "I do."

"Yeah?" Dean snapped. "Then why won't you look at me? Don't wanna see my pretty black eyes?"

Cas took a deep breath, then turned onto his back. "Because I love you." Dean flinched, drawing back, and Cas still didn't open his eyes. "You're a demon, and I'm an angel. Yet I feel more pure with you than I ever did in Heaven."

Dean's eyes flared black, and his hands flexed convulsively, searching for something to tear into, something to bleed.

_Through every forest, above the trees_  
_Within my stomach, scraped off my knees_  
_I drink the honey inside your hive_  
_You are the reason I stay alive_

"Yeah." Dean forced his fingers to relax, bringing them back between Cas' legs. He pushed them in again, gently, ignoring Cas' efforts to reach his cock. "Yeah, Cas. I know."

**Author's Note:**

> find me on [tumblr](http://relucant.tumblr.com) or [twitter](http://twitter.com/relucanting).
> 
> I'm nice.


End file.
